Let them be girls!

It amazes me that despite the fact that we all want the best for our kids, that we worry about body image with our daughters, eating right, etc., yet I have yet to see anyone comment on the fact that little girls clothes are basically womens clothes, worse yet, hoochie mama clothes...but smaller.

Perhaps I'm not reading or in touch with the right people, but really, as a mother of a 4 year old girl, that practically bought her nothing when she hit size 6 because it seems that everything was too revealing or too grown up.  Ok, not everything but damn near everything.  Seriously, I practically stopped buying her clothes.  Why would a 4 year old, or even a 9 year old need a backless halter?  Or a shirt with faux necklaces?  Or a faux wrap that accentuates their...bosom!?!?  Really, what the hell are we allowing kids clothing manufacturers to tell our little girls?  We move a step forward with campaigns embracing all body type's like Dove's, but then manufacturers are creating little girls clothes that I would not wear, nor do I plan to let my daughter wear at age 18, and I'll be damned if I'm getting it for her now.

Here's the disclaimer, I'm not a prude, I love fashion (seriously, high end editorial nothing's practical you better be a size 0 fashion), I want to look nice, and I want my daughter to look nice, be comfortable, but I want her to look like A GIRL!  I don't want any free fucking lip gloss with her $70 shoes!  I don't want anything off the shoulder!  In a day and age where I worry about human trafficking, sexual predators, pedophiles and crazies in general, plus the fact that she is tall for her age, I DON'T NEED MY CHILD TO LOOK ANY OLDER THAN SHE IS.

There is plenty of time for fights over mini-skirts and ripped jeans and too tight or too suggestive clothes, that's called her teen years.  I'm not going to deprive myself of that rite of passage by dressing her up as a totstitute?!  If I embrace it and teach her to embrace it now, what am I going to complain about later?  Ladies, speak out on this subject and let your voices count.  LET LITTLE GIRLS LOOK LIKE LITTLE GIRLS!

If anyone knows of any group that speaks to this subject, please let me know!!

Days like this

I am driving to Milwaukee today for a trade show, and then tomorrow I leave with the kids to visit my family, so time is tight, I am exhausted and then there are days like today.  Somehow, someway I've always noticed that the more imperative it is that I get sleep, the more I can count on the fact that one of my children will prevent that from happening.  Be it a cold, the impromptu ear infection, or frankly, no reason at all, they will make sure mommy gets no sleep.  

Now, I am exhausted and I don't want to see them or talk to them because every fucking noise, breathing, the keyboard clacking, is annoying.  Then I look at my poor sleep deprived children and I want to cry, until they start running through the house (apartment, we are city dwellers, and I actually like my neighbors!) and I turn into the evil voiced super over enunciating witch.  I am too fucking old to run on three hours sleep, it makes me crazy!!  Fuuuuuck!  Now instead of doing all the things I have to do for tonight and tomorrow, and being the sharp cookie I normally am (ha!) I am now sitting zombie-like, the kids are fending for themselves and I'm venting (thanks for listening by the way).  And at the crux of the problem is the fact that my 2yo DOES NOT SLEEP!!  He used to sleep, but about a month (or two, who know?  I'm sleep deprived!) ago he stopped taking naps with me, he only sleeps with the sitter, so his nighttime sleep is all fucked up, his eyes are red and bloodshot, he is exhausted, and even when he gets his nap, he's getting up at 5am so no matter how you slice it, my poor son is sleep deprived and I want to scream, POBRECITO!! 

In conclusion, I better go make some coffee and get a move on, and thanks again for listening.

Dear blogger mamas...how do you do it?!?

Admittedly, I'm new (very new, as in just learning how to get a clue, new), but I've been checking you out, and you have amazing sites, have time to exercise, travel, have babies, raise the babies, update your content continually, have an intricate on-line society (thank you to all who have welcomed me, you are dolls!), are funny, well informed, so, HOW DO YOU DO IT?  


Do you sleep?  When was the last time you turned on your TV?  Have I wandered into the land of Stepford Mommy Bloggers?  I have to tell you that I am equally impressed, as I am jealous, but I'm more impressed.


So this post is really a plea for help, insight and perhaps a virtual hug, because right now I feel like I'm out of my league and out of my mind, but I am learning a lot and meeting some of you (who again, are dolls!) and others (who are not such dolls, but dammit your content is good), and I'm looking forward to learning more.


Ladies, you have created an online world as open and warm as a mothers embrace, as intense as a bridal gown sale, and as competitive as a beauty pageant.  You've put large corporations on check, have put your foot down and given them that motherly look that let's them know they better listen.  I ♥ it!!!


Kudos you kick ass mother $%#%^!!!!  You rock!

Someone should have told us!

We had some new neighbors move in a while back and they had a pet rabbit.  My 2 and 4  year olds went crazy, it was instant love for this quiet furball, and I fell under the spell as well thinking, hmmm, I don't have to walk it, I can keep it contained from time to time...it's perfect!  The neighbor told me how long they've had the bunny, that he sleeps with one of the kids (not happening in my home), etc., etc.  Fast forward a couple of months and her bunny is pregnant!  At this point our pet beta is ranking low with the kids, and I'm thinking we're getting a bunny for free, yay me!  So welcome Ollie Bunny (named by my daughter after a Wonder Pets character).  


Ollie is loud, rambunctious (I can't believe I spelled that right on the first try!), isn't really interested in us as a whole, much less the kids but will fake it for a carrot.  I go online and try to learn a bit about their care in my free time (ok, so I looked at a page of info), but I thought since I'd had a long conversation with the neighbor on care, he'd be fine, well, Ollie died.  Apparently bunnies have a VERY delicate digestive track.  They have to have a very strict diet consisting mostly of hay, or else...


It was sad.  It was costly to try to save him.  It was my 4 yo's introduction to death.  


Fast forward a couple of months to...surprise!!!  Our nanny, who had fallen in love with Ollie Bunny brought us...ANOTHER BUNNY!  Welcome Fuzzy Bunny!  Fuzzy is a cute little bunny, with the sweetest disposition.  He sits on my daughter's lap, let's me hold him like a baybe.  Will sit beside you so that you can pet him easily.  Once, my daughter's on the ground, my son climbs on her and the bunny climbed on him!  It was hilarious!  Fuzzy Bunny is the perfect bunny.  Having learned from my mistake and taking life pretty serious (no matter how many legs you have), I was VERY careful with Fuzzy Bunny laying down the diet and exercise law.  


This morning, Fuzzy Bunny passed away.  It was very sudden and sad.  The vet assured me that there was nothing I could have done to prevent his passing, basically BUNNIES ARE VERY DELICATE CREATURES.  I had to leave the kids in the exam room at the vets for a moment so she could speak to me because I was devastated.  The vet and I were both crying. It was bad.  Eventually I pulled it together, for the kids sake, but NO MORE BUNNIES!!  I can't take it!  And it concerns me that my kids will think that these things are disposable!


Later, after I was calm and after a nice lunch watching the symphony rehearsal at the park, my daughter and I were talking about Fuzzy Bunny dying, and I told her I was very sad.  Her response, "Why?  Can't you think about him?  I have him right here." as she points to her forehead.  Thanks doll for helping mama cope.

I understand...

Wait!!  Before you go calling Child Protective Services, get down off your soapbox and your idealisms and LET'S GET REAL.  

Background:  I am very traditional when it comes to parenting and family life.  I am Cuban-Colombian and was raised in a highly traditional home a-la "old school".  Time out's didn't exist, the bottom was created for spanking, and we got spanked "cantando" where the spanks coincide with the syllables. 

Now, I will restate this, my husband and I decided as a unit that we would not spank our kids (ages 4 & 2).  Thankfully we have been able to stick to this.  There are loved ones that we know who believe in spanking, and that's their prerogative.  That's their child.  Yes, there are studies and data showing that spanking only makes for a more violent child, but not everyone believes everything they read.  Then there's the old adage, "My parents spanked me and I turned out ok", but really that can be applied to anything, just change the word spanked to abandoned, traumatized, loved, hated, spoiled, whatever, with the exceptions of the Ted Bundy's of the world "ok" is a pretty safe catch-all.

Is it obvious at this point that I don't want my kids to turn out "ok"?  I try to educate myself, I pray, I drink, I take "calmantes", just to that my kids are under the impression that they have a level headed mother...and then my daughter turned 4...

She is a smart girl, and she know how to push mommy's crazy button, and I haven't been able to figure out how to disable that damn thing.  So when I'm being "calm" and speaking to her clearly and slowly (like the crazed maniac she can be) and she is doing this hoppy, flip-floppy fish dance, whining, faux-crying and making other noises likened to hyperventilating, I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND what would drive a parent to turn their little monster around and slap them on the butt.  Since I don't partake, I instead try distraction, conversation, separation, threats, rescinding of privileges,  and then I turn into the you-wanna-see-mommy-mad-well-you-did-it-now banshee.

Hey, I said I didn't spank, I didn't say I was perfect!!  LOL!!!